This Week in Soapland: 5-10 August

One minute you’re about to move to New Zealand with your best mate, the next you’re laying down the law at his wedding. Such is the way with Marlon, who has sought advice from a solicitor about Paddy and Rhona’s plans to relocate with Leo. Charity is also in fighting mood after winning 20 per cent of the Kings’ haulage business: cutbacks need to be made and – hold onto your hats – moral saviour Edna could be the one in line for the chop.

EastEnders

The days of women throwing themselves at Phil are long gone. In fact, Shirley seems keener on diving off a building than launching herself at her man. But before the world’s most unlikely abseiler makes her charity leap, she has a surprise in store. Phil, though, may be a little distracted by the sight of his dead-eyed son seeking to rehabilitate Ian. Oh for the innocent times when Ben would get his kicks dancing on tables to the hits of Girls Aloud.

Coronation Street

How anyone could lay a hand on Tyrone is a mystery – it must be like punching a Care Bear. Yet right now he can’t lift a pint without wincing from his injuries. Just as well that Kirsty has agreed to see Dr Carter about her anger issues. But will she keep her appointment? Tracy is also under the weather, but gets short shrift from Ken who waves his glasses around before diagnosing lazyitis. Next thing you know, she’s in hospital with an infection in the kidney she got from Samir Rachid.